Wanting to Earn More Doesn't Make You Less Caring

29 Oct

It's Sunday evening and you've got your banking app open. You're scrolling through the direct debits, and every one of them suddenly looks like a decision. The booking app, the email tool, the two hours a week with your VA. Surely something can go?

At the same time, there's a thought you'd never say out loud. I want to earn more than this. Right behind it comes the guilt, because you chose this work to help people, not to get rich.

That's the Passion Paradox showing up in your bank balance. You love your practice and you're brilliant with clients, but the business behind it isn't paying you properly. And nobody in your training ever sat you down to talk about money, so you've been muddling through on instinct.

The myth that caring people shouldn't care about money

There's an unwritten rule in the caring professions. If you really cared, you'd do it for less. Most of us picked it up somewhere along the way, through unpaid training placements, through years of being the one everyone leans on, and through a culture that treats talking about fees as slightly grubby.

You can hear it when fees get said out loud. Your voice goes up at the end, as if your price is a question. You offer a discount before anyone has asked for one. A session runs twenty minutes over and you don't charge for it. Sound familiar? Well, it does to me because I do it too. My mum always used to say, ‘don’t do what I do, do what I tell you’, and this absolutely applies here!

Here's the thing though. Wanting to earn more is not greed. It's wanting to pay your bills, take a proper holiday, put something aside for later and keep doing the work you love for years to come. Your clients benefit too, because a practitioner who isn't worrying about the gas bill has more of herself to give.

It isn't you. The numbers say so.

If money feels tight, you are far from alone. In BACP's 2025 Working Practices survey of over 4,000 members, two thirds said they earn £30,000 or less a year from their counselling work. Almost a third earn £12,500 or less, and only around a third agreed they could earn a living from it.

The same survey found members average around 10 paid client hours a week. Coaching looks much the same, with the ICF's 2025 Global Coaching Study putting the average coach at 11.6 hours a week of coaching work. That isn't people being lazy. It's what happens when all the admin, marketing and general ‘businessing’ has to fit around a handful of paid hours.

BACP's 2025 membership survey adds the final piece. Members named finding clients or growing a private practice as their biggest challenge, with work-life balance and preventing burnout next on the list. That isn't a list of personal failings. It's what it looks like when brilliant practitioners are handed a qualification and no business manual.

Money worry eats your capacity

When the money doesn't stretch, the worry doesn't stay in your banking app. It follows you into sessions, onto the school run and into bed at 2am. You catch yourself doing sums in your head while your partner is talking, and then you feel guilty about that too.

That background hum uses up energy, and energy is what your practice runs on. Less of it means slower replies to enquiries, notes that pile up and a creeping dread before a full day. So, the best time to sort out the money side is now, while you still have some headroom, rather than once you're running on empty.

The cost-cutting reflex

When money is tight, cutting costs feels like the sensible, grown-up thing to do. Sometimes it is. Most of us have an app we signed up for in a burst of January enthusiasm and haven't opened since. Cancel that one now!

But there's a point where cutting costs starts costing you more than it saves. It usually arrives when you cut the things that were buying back your time. Your VA, your booking system, the tool that sends reminders, so you don't have to. Those aren't luxuries. They're the reason you had time to see clients in the first place.

Let's do the maths on your VA

Say you charge £100 for a client session and pay your VA £35 an hour. Every hour your VA spends on admin is an hour you can spend with a client. You earn £100, pay out £35, and you're £65 better off.

Now let your VA go to save money. The admin hasn't vanished, so you pick it up yourself. The hour you used to spend with a client now goes on emails and invoices, and it earns you nothing. You've saved £35 but given up £100, which leaves you £65 an hour worse off from day one. Awkward!

Even the software companies have noticed this. Practice Better, who sell practice management software, describe how their founder found that every new client added hours of admin to his week, which pushed his real hourly rate down. The work around each session grows with every client you take on, but your week doesn't get any longer.

Now, a fair challenge. This maths only works if that hour would actually be filled by a paying client. And that's exactly where things get worse.

The £65 is only the tip of the iceberg

Think about what your VA was really doing. Replying to enquiries the same day. Following up with the person who said I'll have a think and come back to you. Booking in the 1:1s after networking. Getting your blog onto your website and your posts onto social media. None of it feels urgent, which is why it's the first thing to go when you're doing everything yourself.

It slips down your list because that's what happens to everyone when the week is full and no one ever explained which jobs keep a business alive. But those jobs are your pipeline. They're how new clients find you, and how a warm enquiry turns into a booked session.

The tricky bit is the delay. Stop following up today and your diary probably looks fine for a few weeks. Then the gaps start to appear, income dips and the pressure to cut even more kicks in. Round and round it goes.

Predictable income changes everything

So, if cutting isn't the answer, what is? The real fix is making your income more predictable. When you know roughly what's coming in each month, you can plan your VA's hours, keep the tools that save you time and stop doing sums at 2am (well try, anyway 😂).

Packages are one of the most practical ways to get there. Instead of selling one session at a time, you offer a set number of sessions as a programme. Your clients get a clear plan, and you get a steadier income. Let them pay in monthly instalments and they can spread the cost too, which makes it easier for more people to say yes.

This doesn't mean forcing every client into a bundle. Some people genuinely need single sessions, and that's fine. It means having an option that works for your business as well as your clients.

Make it lighter to run, not cheaper to run

Building a steady income needs structure, so make your practice easier to manage. Start with process before software. Write down how an enquiry becomes a booked client in your practice, step by step, then spot the bits you repeat every single time.

Those repeated bits are where templates, systems and automation earn their keep. A saved reply for new enquiries. A booking confirmation that sends itself. A follow-up email that goes out three days after a discovery call, whether you remember or not. Each one shaves a few minutes off your week, and those minutes add up to hours.

This is the thinking behind the Streamline and Structure and Discover Delegation pillars of the More Profitable Me® Framework. Build the structure first, then hand over the jobs you dread. Your VA's hours go further, your apps pay for themselves, and you get back to the work you trained for, and you love.

The Reality Checks

None of this is a one-size-fits-all rule, so here are the caveats worth knowing.

• The VA maths assumes your diary can fill. If the enquiries aren't there yet, point your VA's hours at the jobs that bring clients in, like follow-ups and marketing, rather than letting them go altogether.

• Not every subscription is worth keeping. Review them once or twice a year. Keep the ones that save you time and cancel the ones you'd forgotten about.

• Sometimes cutting back is the right call. If the money genuinely won't cover your costs right now, reducing your VA's hours or narrowing their tasks is kinder to your business than stopping completely.

• Packages need clear terms. Set out cancellations, refunds and what happens if someone needs to stop. Counsellors and therapists should check their professional body's guidance on contracting and fees.

• This takes time. Steadier income and smoother systems don't appear in a weekend. They're worth building anyway.

• I'm not an accountant or financial adviser. For tax or financial decisions, speak to a qualified professional.

Where to start

And if you’d like to understand more about what’s holding you back from creating that signature package and structuring your business to run it, join Alex Vitillo and me for the Breakthrough and Build Workshop Thursday 5th November, 12 noon, online.

Book Here.

Alex is the money mindset expert from Breathing Heart Coaching, and you know what I do! I use repeatable process, systems and automation to give you more time to do what you love, because…

You deserve a business that supports you as much as you support your clients.

Frequently asked questions

I am a therapist in private practice, is it wrong to want to earn more?

No. Wanting to earn more means wanting to cover your costs, rest properly and keep doing your work for the long term. Caring about your clients and charging fairly go hand in hand, because a practice that pays you properly is one that can keep showing up for the people who need it.

I am self-employed and money is tight, which business costs should I cut first?

Start with anything you don't use. List every subscription from your bank statements and mark which ones save you time each week. Cancel the unused ones first, and leave the time-savers until last, because cutting them often costs more in lost client hours than it saves.

I am a wellness practitioner with a VA, how do I know if they're worth the money?

Compare your VA's hourly rate with what you earn in a client hour. If a session earns you more than an hour of support costs, and you can fill the time they free up, your VA is making you money. Use them strategically and make sure they handle the jobs that bring clients in too, like replying to enquiries and following up. They will be more consistent than you are at getting it done, and they are one step away from your business so they won’t feel embarrassed about chasing the payments either.

I am a health coach with an up-and-down income, how do I make it more predictable?

Move from single sessions towards packages or programmes, offer monthly instalments, and set up a simple follow-up process so enquiries don't go cold. A steadier income lets you plan ahead instead of reacting month by month.

I am a sole trader in health and wellbeing, should I let clients pay in instalments?

Often, yes. Instalments help clients spread the cost and give you a more regular income. Agree clear terms upfront for missed payments and cancellations and use a payment tool that collects automatically so you're not chasing anyone.